KingMidget's Ramblings

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Come Deviate With Me

I did this thing last week.  Published what I call a long short story for the Kindle. Yes, it is only available as an e-book on the one platform. The story, at 16,000 words, isn’t really long enough for a paperback, but I may come back to that idea at some point.

Deviation Cover_Amazon

I wrote this story a few years ago as an experiment. It’s pretty much all dialogue with a very small amount of context and description thrown in where I felt it was necessary.

So, what is Deviation.  Well … Johnny and Mickey are brothers, hanging out on a Friday night. Johnny just wants to have fun, get laid, and do it all over again next week. Mickey’s ready for something more. He’s a bit of a deeper thinker. And while they sit in a diner, ogling the waitress, Johnny gets a text from their father. Their mom has been arrested.

What follows is a weekend of discovery of family secrets. Of digging a little deeper.

It’s got one review (thank you, BG):

A very interesting short story told almost entirely in dialogue. The banter between the two main characters is sharp and flows nicely. The dark subject matter may not be to everyone’s taste (lots of adult language and situations, if that sort of thing bothers you), but it’s certainly an innovative concept.

So, give it a try. It’s only .99 for chrissakes. But be forewarned. Mickey and Johnny are foul-mouthed and have sex on their minds. This isn’t for everybody and certainly is a break from what I typically write.

The good news is that deciding to do this has motivated me to move forward on other things. Northville Five & Dime needs some attention. I’ve been proofing the first part this week and refreshing my memory of the story. I’ll finish that this weekend and then will move on to part two, which I wrote about two-thirds of before giving up on it some time ago. Once I have that written, I’m going to work on polishing both parts and seeing what I can do with them while writing the third and concluding part. Wish me luck. Northville is more in line with my traditional writing and I think has the potential for finding an audience.

6 responses to “Come Deviate With Me

  1. Carrie Rubin February 24, 2018 at 12:35 pm

    I read the story. I was impressed with how you managed to tell so much through dialogue using only bits of exposition, and I liked how you were able to maintain that while also shifting settings and developing character. That’s a tall order. I have to admit I was uncomfortable with the characters’ objectification of women, so it’s good you put the adviser warning in.

    Glad to hear you’re continuing to write. Must feel good to have some momentum going again!

    • kingmidget February 24, 2018 at 1:04 pm

      Carrie, thank you for your comment and kind words about the story. Your concern about the objectification of women is well-founded. It is likely one of the reasons I took so long to publish this. Truth is it was ready to go a couple of years ago. I occasionally see writers talk about how the story goes where the characters take it … or something like that. I never understood that concept until I wrote this story. When I started it, all I knew was that I wanted to write a story about two guys sitting in a diner having a conversation. And it went from there. With the way I wrote the story, picking a random word out of the dictionary every few hundred words really freed me up to make this a different story. And instead of using each word and playing it safe, I tried to keep stretching the boundaries a bit. The reality is, unfortunately, that far too many women objectify women, particularly when there aren’t any around to hear them. I let these characters go.

      • Carrie Rubin February 24, 2018 at 1:14 pm

        Oh yes, I meant to add that the picking of random words from the dictionary was very clever!

      • kingmidget February 24, 2018 at 1:19 pm

        I’ll give you an example of how that worked. When I got to the scene where the boys confront their father, the word I selected was tinkling. My first thought was of a child having to tinkle. But that didn’t fit anywhere in what was going on. Then I thought of the tinkling of the piano. So, maybe their father was home alone mournfully playing the piano when they got home. But that didn’t fit either. So, yeah, there was a woman there with him. But that’s just not enough deviation. So, let’s make her a prostitute. But that wasn’t enough either, so … yeah, four prostitutes.

      • Carrie Rubin February 24, 2018 at 1:25 pm

        I might have to try that some time. Would be very interesting to see where things end up.

      • kingmidget February 24, 2018 at 1:27 pm

        I highly recommend it as an opportunity to experiment.

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